Do You Still Remember Me?

Note: This post is not directed at any particular person.  As an introvert, I’ve lost a number of friends because their life or my life changed and then one day I realized that my friend wasn’t responding to me anymore when I tried to get in touch.  If you see yourself in this post, consider reaching out to that introverted friend you haven’t spoken with in a while.

Do you remember me?  We used to be really close.  We shared meals and tough times and things that changed our lives.  Friends grow apart sometimes, but aren’t best friends supposed to pick up where they left off even if weeks or months have gone by?  I’m an introvert and I’m perfectly content to spend most of my weekends with my sewing or crafts or books.  I used to be able to reach out to you when I was ready for some friend time and we’d get together.  Now you don’t answer my calls, you have to ask who this is when I text, and you changed your email and forgot to let me know.

Its too easy to blame myself for the distance between us, but it’s not entirely my fault.  I kept reaching out to you long after you stopped responding.  I still miss you, even if it’s been years since we last really talked.  You know I don’t make friends easily.  You know that sometimes you have to drag me along to be social at times, and no matter how reluctant I am, I’m always thankful that you helped me get out of my comfort zone and have some fun.

It’s bewildering to me that we aren’t even friends anymore.  Did I do something wrong?  Is it really that easy to forget about me?  Did you think that I wouldn’t want to be friends anymore when your life went in a different direction?  It’s so hard for me to reach out, then when you don’t reach back it hurts so much.

I’m still here.  And I’d still like to be friends, no matter how long it’s been.  It still hurts a little bit every time I think about you.  I miss you.  My friends are part of my family, and losing you in my life leaves an ache that never goes away.  I know I probably don’t do this “friend” thing “right”.  But I’m still here.  I still care.  I hope you do too.

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